Thursday, January 3, 2008

Farce: Win/Win/Win/Win (and outraged Muslims)

The Dutch Consumer Safety Board has at last hit the jackpot. EURSOC is reporting that their farcical approach to consumer safety caused a bit of a stir before Christmas. But I must say, it's worth every cent!

Let me first clarify to the uninitiated that the blessed country of the Netherlands is partly inhabited by hereditary "Vandals", an obscure Germanic tribe called the Batavians (maps) that was subject of a mutation in the DNA make-up, rendering the afflicted person bent on petty destruction and vicious ruination of other people's properties. I dare say envy has something to do with it.

Although perpetually in attendance in some way or other, this particular form of hooliganism comes prominently to the fore in specific periods in history, one of those being the Protestant revolt against Roman Catholicism in which Iconoclasm and other wanton destruction played such a dominent role.

The affected gen is also triggered into action by the noble game of football and the annual festivities at the year's end that are traditionally accompanied by a veritable orgy of pyrotechnics. The result is a fortnightly terror campaign perpetrated by one half of the population (males of any age and description) upon the other half (everyone else (including pets, livestock and wildlife)).

To come up so frequently with a public message that actually produces some impact on an increasingly callous audience, must be a tremendous strain on the creative talents of the people on the Consumer Safety Board.

I dare say, why should the taxpayer foot the bill for an annual campaign to tell these testosterone infested maniacs to "please be careful not to blow off any body parts!" Who are we to keep a few hens from coming home to roost? That - of course - is anathema to the Leftists inhabiting the Ministry responsible for the propagation of victimhood. Terror pays.

But - chapeau! - this year they excelled, perhaps inadvertently also impacting a few other trouble spots. The Islamophobia that is holding the world in its grip - I mean the fear of Islam provoked by Islamic acts of terrorism - affects people in different ways. The majority sit like frozen rabbits in the headlights blaming the victims, while others put up a fight and try to tackle the situation head on. The rabbits accuse them of being intolerant towards intolerance and call them fascists.

The head-on attitude resulted in the preceding Centre-Right government deciding to modestly contribute to the coalition's military actions in Iraq and Afghanistan in order to establish the rule of law, while the Leftist opposition protested vehemently in reverant tones against it - as if they were addressing a funeral: some terrorists "might actually get killed" ...

Based on the fact that humor is the best remedy against terror induced paralysis I counselled the rabbit type Islamophobes (I'm hesitant to describe the Stockholm syndrome driven delusionists in those terms) earlier last year in a posting on The Lighthouse in "Relativism on the Couch with Dr Pat, Part III" as follows:

"These are times that we have nothing to fear, but fear itself [3] ... so take position in front of a large mirror, stick your thumbs in your ears, while waiving your fingers forward and backward and start jumping up and down in a steady cadence, yelling a high pitched BBBBRRRRrrrrrrr!!! as loud as you can ..."
But now we have an alternative in more ways than one - a win/win/win/win situation all round!

1. The Batavian pyrotechnics consumer gets cautioned not to blow off their body parts, while the Ministry's 2007 expenditure target is also met;

2. Everyone else gets a laugh for their tax money;

3. As explained above, there's a good chance the rabbits are shocked out of their catatonic paralysis by so much irreverence; who knows, perhaps even mustering the courage to face the real world;

4. Unemployed Arab actors of Iraqi descent get a well-paid gig on home soil, in the bargain providing them with the opportunity to go say hello to mum.

Of course other Muslims (and their Leftist advocates) will get upset and hurt a bit inside (don't we know that words are weapons too ...?!), but is there anything that is not offensive to them? The very fact that infidels dare to share the air they breath is an offence in itself. So ... let them just rage it off and burn something or other in effigy...

- Caption: "Islamic Rage Boy", courtesy "The Nose on Your Face - News So Fake You'll Swear it Came From the Mainstream Media" -

As for everyone else ... enjoy this one. After that, you can click through to the posting on EURSOC or the site of the "Liberation Army Against Freedom" who have more versions on the same theme at your disposal.

- Categorised on Articles in Humor -


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